It’s bad enough that everyone thinks that Black folks don’t tip. But it sucks even more when you know a Black person that doesn’t tip and you have to go out to eat with them.
Maybe you were invited to brunch with your college homegirls since everyone is in one place at the same time for once. You know Tiffany is going to be there and Tiffany, though sweet as all get out, will tip enough to round up to the next dollar. Her $23.36 meal and constant requests to “keep the ‘mosas coming” does not warrant a 64 cent pat on the back.
Perhaps you’re going to celebrate your cousin’s promotion and he invited most of the immediate fam. His mom and your aunt Sharon doesn’t go out to eat unless it’s someone’s birthday and because she doesn’t get tipped working for the Department of Corrections, she doesn’t understand why these folks need one too.
It’s frustrating, to say the least. But what can you do?
You could avoid going out to eat with them.
Maybe you don’t invite the non-tippers to your next birthday dinner. But then that’s rude, especially if they’re close to you. Then, you have to think of excuses why you didn’t invite them, especially after they see the snaps from your other homegirl that was in attendance.
So you could scale it back and just do something at the crib or elsewhere that doesn’t require gratuity. This automatically limits your social greatness which isn’t fair.
You could overtip to overcompensate.
Instead of sliding them money on the sly like a church usher to a 8 year old, you could cover their tip AND yours. You are your auntie’s keeper. But did Dante really deserve a $10 tip for $5 work? No, he didn’t. You shouldn’t feel like you have to do this guy a solid because your friend or auntie is foul. But if you can afford to do so and want to do so for #theculture, then… okay, girl.
You could do nothing at all.
You include your tip and call it a day. This could easily turn into a teachable moment where you explain to them how wait staff wage disparities actually get down. This might not change their mind, but at least you’ve done your part.